Have you ever interacted with a child and didn't know what to do or say to connect with them? It happens to everyone! You might ask them a question and get radio silence ...
I've worked with children for over a decade and while there are no perfect steps to connecting with a child, I've found a few different tips that might help you. Here they are in no particular order:
Get to know their name - quickly! Having someone know your own personal name matters; you won't convince me otherwise. Know their name and use it often during your conversation. The child will feel safe and that you have a vested interest in them!
For some reason, kids of almost any age love to see how high they can jump! Lift your hand way up in the sky and challenge them to see if they can jump up and reach the target. Make the height realistic and most likely the child will have a great big smile before they lift off!
Have some classic jokes in your back pocket! Kids love jokes and humour is a wonderful way to connect with children of any age. Not sure where to start? Here are a few jokes that I enjoy: What has 4 wheels and flies? A garbage truck! What has 2 legs but can’t walk? A pair of pants! What kind of fish only swims at night? A starfish! When using humour, try to make sure that everyone is included and in on the joke.
Learn a few magic tricks or how to juggle. There is no better feeling when you pull of a magic trick or juggle in front of a group of students and their jaws hit the floor! The magic tricks don't need to be super complicated and you can use everyday objects to help: cards, coins or toothpicks. Follow this link to see my favourite trick to do for students: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QdQKo-D5F4Y
Notice big and small things that are going on in their lives. For example, if a child gets a haircut, let them know that you notice. If they have a birthday, wish them a "happy birthday" and get them something small like a pencil that changes colour with the heat from your hand. We all want to be seen and valued and sometimes a small comment or gesture can go a long way!
In short, you will start to develop positive relationships with children when they know that you see them, have time for them and care for them as individuals. This can happen in big or small ways. As an elementary school teacher, I've found that these moments don't always happen in the classroom. In fact, they often happen on the playground, in the hallways or when kids are eating their lunch.
The ideas above are only a handful of thoughts on developing positive relationships with children. What would you add?
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